Karan Johar reveals he’d turn off the lights while getting intimate: ‘I have body dysmorphia’

Karan Johar Pic/Instagram

Filmmaker Karan Johar, who has been the brains behind the biggest blockbusters of Indian cinema, opened up on body dysmorphia and how he was mocked for being effeminate. The Dharma honcho also recalled taking up classes to bring a baritone in his voice and crying for not being like other boys.

In an interview with Faye D'Souza, Karan spoke about his struggles with body image and how it affected his personal life. "I have body dysmorphia. I am very awkward getting into a pool. I don't know how to do it without feeling pathetic. I try hard to overcome it. I always wear oversized clothes. Even in moments of intimacy, I put the lights out," said the filmmaker.

Karan also recalled his childhood thinking to himself that he'd failed his parents for being effeminate. "I felt I wasn't the boy that they should have had. I was conditioned to believe that because I was effeminate. I was unlike all the other boys in my school."

Sharing a painful memory from a talent competition when he was a 3-year-old, Karan shared, "I did a dance. I could tell that some people were sneering and laughing and my mother was in the audience. I remember going to the house, closing the door, and crying thinking, ‘ Why can't I be like other boys.'"

Growing up, Karan tried his best to modulate his voice by taking up classes. There was a gentleman there who told me that I had an effeminate voice and that it isn't going to be easy in life for me. He sent me to a class that would bring some kind of baritone in my voice. All this time, I was telling my dad that I was going for computer classes because I didn't want to tell them that this is what I was going to do," he added.

Meanwhile, on the work front, Karan is basking in the success of his latest production 'Kill'. The film, which had its world premiere at the Toronto International Film Festival's Midnight Madness section and later featured at the Tribeca Film Festival, tells the gripping story of army commando Amrit (portrayed by Lakshya) racing against time and armed adversaries on a New Delhi-bound train to rescue his beloved Tulika (played by Tanya Maniktala). Directed by Nikhil Nagesh Bhat, it was released on July 5.

(With inputs from ANI)