Sanam Saeed: ‘I don’t allow people to crack me with pressure’

Sanam Saeed

There is a word Barzakh director Asim Abbasi has for his show's leading lady, Sanam Saeed. He calls her his ‘entheogen,' a spiritual psychedelic drug. The secret behind the name lies in the duo's new series, which tells the story of a reclusive 76-year-old man who invites his children and grandchildren to celebrate his wedding with the spirit of his true love. The first thing we ask her is whether it helps knowing the director's process when the theme is so complex. "It helps to work with the director who is also the writer. There is more room to question, be curious and explore. He knows all my weak points. That helped the performance. There is a great level of trust between us, so the drive to push boundaries together is far more. This is a nuanced character; I had to bring control into the performance. Sherzaad is neither from this realm nor from the other. She is the glue to this family drama," says Saeed, who reunites with Abbasi after their much-loved film Cake (2018).

A story like this, part magic realism and part family drama, has no reference point. But Saeed isn't looking for one. "Why seek a reference at all? Sherzaad can be a reference point someday. She is soft yet stern, and brings a feeling of loss. You can't read her emotions."

A still from Barzakh

The July 19 release reunites the actor with Fawad Khan 12 years after their popular show, Zindagi Gulzar Hai. Naturally, there must be pressure to match up to their last show's success. "Twelve years ago, they had never seen Fawad and me like they did in Zindagi Gulzar Hai. This time again, we will intrigue them. Fawad has always been held up by everyone as this good-looking guy, the romantic hero who elicits that reaction, ‘Ah! Fawad!' But this time, he returns to show his range. His iconic characters have stuck with him, and this one is raw and authentic. He has been breaking that mould, I had to do it too. I am more than Kashaf. It is always an honour to work with Fawad; he matches my gusto and professionalism."

Saeed doesn't concern herself with the pressure of audience's expectations. Today, she has reached the place where she operates only from the love for her art and the desire to tell different stories. "I don't allow people to crack me with pressure. I have been through that pressure of Kashaf. I had to shake that stress off of who I am and what kind of role I would pick next. I had fears [arising from thoughts of], ‘Will they hate me? Will they not look up to Kashaf? Will the bubble burst?' Since 2014, I spent three years getting that pressure out of my system. Today, I am only nervous whether the character and the show will work. There are some actors who think as actors, and some as stars. I am an actor who follows the role. I don't think how it will affect my career and my future casting options. Asim's work always strikes a chord with me. I want to throw myself into roles that are so different from the work I do in movies and TV. I am grateful for the gifts I am getting and not worried about the risks I am taking."

After Barzakh, the actor moves to Pakistan's Netflix series, Jo Bachay Hain Sang Samait Lo that stars Fawad, Mahira Khan and Ahad Raza Mir. "I love the power of TV, but it restricts you and you can get tired of it. OTT gave me an opportunity to show what more I am capable of; it allows us to explore the raw side of acting. Films are for fantasy, TV is for family dramas, but OTT is for gritty stories. It has been equalising, where actors shed their star power and simply perform. With the Netflix series, we are showing what Pakistan does best. Momina Duraid, who has produced Humsafar, Zindagi Gulzar Hai and Dastaan, is the force behind it. The story has five different tracks, 10 stars and intergenerational stories, going back and forth."

Does she feel there will be an osmosis and cross-cultural exchange thanks to OTT? "This show is produced by [Indians and Pakistanis]. In terms of acting, I don't know when that will happen. All pools need new blood to create bigger and beautiful things. In a utopian world, that would have happened, but I don't know when it will happen in the real world."