'My guy doesn't want to commit...'

Dear Diana

Dear Diana,
I'm 27 and my boyfriend is 28. We've been going out for more than two years now. He's a wonderful person, but as soon as I talk about marriage, he turns uneasy. He says he's not able to commit because he wants to settle down. He has also been keeping unwell due to his sinus problem. Should I back off and forget about him or wait for him?
- Rayna


Illustration/Amit Bandre

Dear Rayna,
Your guy is commitment phobic. He is dilly-dallying as he is not yet sure about marriage. If he is facing health problems, he needs urgent medical attention. If he says he wants to settle down, you need to ask him what he means and for how long you will have to wait for him to settle down. If he gives evasive replies, take the hint and move on. This guy does not deserve your love. Find someone who will respect you.

Dear Diana,
My problem started three weeks ago when my boyfriend, with whom I've been living-in for the past one year, started doubting my fidelity. He called me names. We had a massive showdown. I thought it was over that night, but from the next day he has stopped talking to me. I tried to explain, but he was in no mood to listen. It's almost four weeks since we've spoken to each other. I have gone back to stay at my parental home. He stays in a rented accommodation. My stuff is still lying at his place. What should I do?
- Gayatri

Dear Gayatri,
He may have called you names and got angry in the heat of the moment, but he needs to listen to you. You need to tell him the truth to clear his muddled mind. If he is in no mood to listen, take the hint and move out. He seems to have lost interest in you and may be telling you things to get you out of his life. He has already shut you out, it's time you did too.