26 April,2011 06:52 AM IST | | Aviva Dharmaraj
Study finds that there's a reason why love hurts. Active! gets expert opinion on the subject plus, is love really blind?
The results of a new study published in US journal, Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, are unlikely to surprise country singer Billy Ray Cyrus. The daddy to Miley Cyrus had it figured out in 1992, the time of the record smash Don't Tell My Heart. He was right. His Achy Breaky heart wouldn't understand. Neither would ours, going by the study, which found that regions of the brain that respond to physical pain overlap with those that react to seeing an ex's photograph.
The study was based on the reaction of 40 individuals who had recently experienced an unwanted break-up. The volunteers were made to perform two kinds of tasks, while being hooked up to MRI machines. The first was the Social Rejection task, in which participants viewed a picture of their ex-partner and were asked to think about how being rejected had made them feel. The second, named the Physical Pain task, had the left arm of volunteers stimulated with a level of heat comparable to holding a very hot cup of coffee.
To remove bias, volunteers were given a picture of a friend and asked to think back to a happy time, and provided a warm stimulus on the arm. Clinical psychologist Varkha Chulani is not surprised by the results of the study. "Emotions and actions are related. We literally feel a physical discomfort when an emotional upset takes place.
When a child has to give an examination, for which he is anxious, his body manifests that anxiety in different ways. He could experience feelings of nausea, his heart rate would accelerate and he is likely to have clammy hands. So, it's hardly surprising that one experiences actual heartache," she says. While holding a cup of coffee and having to relive memories of a break-up might seem like disparate events, it boils down to the psychological and physiological make-up of a person being interrelated, explains Chulani. "These aspects are isolated for scientific study, but they are not separate entities."u00a0
The fear of pain, however, should not close someone off from the possibility of faling in love. "Do you want to go through the motions of living or do you want to be alive," emphasises Chulani. "We are always in a hurry to recover. Grieving is an important stage in getting over someone."
Is love blind?
But when it comes to that other cliche about love being blind, opthamologist Ajay Dudani says that he would be reluctant to jump to conclusions. "Ninety per cent of the stimulus comes from the eyes. I would put love down to chemistry instead of sight," he laughs.
Tips to get over heartbreak
Know that Grief is necessary.
Allow yourself time to grieve, as it is a natural part of the healing process.
Don't get into the blame game.
Blaming your ex or circumstances for your break-up will not serve any purpose, and only prolong getting over him/ her.
Accept reality.
This will help you come to terms with the situation and move on, gracefully.
Cherish the good times.
Remembering the good time will provide you with a balanced perspective on the relationship, and prevent bitterness.
Stick to a routine.
This will help you from sliding into depression.
