I think more about her best friend than I think about her

Dear Diana,
My girlfriend and I have been together for almost a year and a half now.However, I think I've fallen for her best friend. I don't know if it is mere infatuation or a genuine liking, but I keep thinking about her more than I think about anyone else. I know this is wrong on my part!

Before we got together, her friend and she had fought over a guy they both liked but who eventually chose her best friend. She had almost gone into depression because of this.

Now I even doubt if I love my girl or I ever had because if I would have, I wouldn't have been thinking about her friend for over four months now! My girl has even confronted me over this, but I have pleaded innocence. I don't know how she'll take it if I tell her the truth. Also her exams are coming up...

P Rai

Dear Friend,
Avoid getting into any more trouble by keeping your distance from her friend. Also, you don't know if this girl likes you back. You would be giving up what you have for something that could possibly not go your way. If this friend took you up on your offer, you'd do best to exercise restraint for some time at least. Also, given their history, it would be best to keep your distance now and then maybe break up with your gal after her exams. Wait a while after that and then hookup with the other girl.

Does this count as cheating?

Dear Diana,
Do you think that masturbating whilethinking of someone else, when one is already in a relationship with another woman, cheating on one's partner?u00a0

Name withheld

Dear Friend,
I'm sure most guys fantasise about women they cannot be with in real life. Of course, the real test would be to see if they would act on those fantasies if the opportunity ever came along. As far as simple masturbation goes, it does seem alright as long as you keep it to yourself and not tell your gal.

Will she stand by me despite my average looks?

Dear Diana,
She's 17, I'm 21. I'm not good to look at but definitely have sex appeal. While I'm a middle-class guy, she's a rich gal (and is also very beautiful). She's spoilt for choice as far as boys are concerned but I feel none will love her as much as I do. I doubt she will stick by me forever. Is there a possibility I could get dumped? I read an article in a leading newspaper that beautiful girls don't stick for long with average-looking boys.

Name withheld

Dear Friend,
Live in the moment. If she's with you now, it's because she sees something in you that others cannot and do not. Most studies conducted are speculative at best and are rarely, if ever, conclusive. The subject of study for them is a closed group that need not reflect more than the characteristic of a given group. You and your girlfriend might possibly be an exception to the group and you will never know if you keep letting these things affect you. If your average looks upset you, this could reflect in your overall attitude.