My boyfriend deliberately embarrasses me!

13 May,2011 08:06 AM IST |   |  Diana

My guy thinks it is funny sometimes to call out silly things in front of strangers, to embarrass me. It is not funny. The things he calls out are not true, but he bursts out laughing once he has done it


Dear Diana,
My guy thinks it is funny sometimes to call out silly things in front of strangers, to embarrass me. It is not funny. The things he calls out are not true, but he bursts out laughing once he has done it. I have told him I find it embarrassing. that did not work. Then I have tried being stoic and quiet and not reacting and that does not work. And I do not want to go to his level and do the same to him because that is just not me. He does not just do it to me. He does it to his male friends. What can I do to stop him being Mr Wise Guy and get him to wise up to the fact that he is not very funny at all?

Name withheld

Dear Friend,
If trying to embarrass you in public is something he finds amusing, then I guess he's immature and stupid. If he wants to act like the organ grinder's monkey and entertain the crowds while he is out, so be it. But not at the expense of your feelings. Let him know in no uncertain terms that he will not be tolerated if he does it again. Also ask if he has an overpowering feeling to do it. And what happens if he tries to stop himself. In other words, how much control does he have over his outbursts? So ask him to get it checked out if he feels there might be a problem.

Tit for tat?

Dear Diana,
Six years ago, I asked out a certain woman. I was 22, she was 20. She is very beautiful, smart and fun. She rejected me bluntly because I'm only a few inches taller. It hurt very much but she said it was her preference. Well now six years later, I am successful and women are plentiful, I met this same girl who rejected me working in the mall. I think she almost died when she saw me. Now she wants me, texts calls all the time. What should I do? Should I tell her my preference is a virgin?

Name withheld

Dear Friend,
The best thing to do to get "back at her" is to tell her you are not interested and do not contact her afterwards. Don't give her a reason, this is where it will bother her. She will want to know why and you didn't give it to her. Like the other people said, getting even with a "mean" come back won't really do much. It might make you feel better temporarily, but then you will have to deal with her potentially lashing back at you. Do you really want to deal with that? I don't think so. Just politely but bluntly say "I'm not interested and I don't really have anything to discuss with you." Then, leave it at that. No matter what she says afterwards, leave her alone.

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