24 June,2011 08:25 AM IST | | Diana
Illustration/ Satish Acharya
Dear Diana,
My daughter came home for her delivery. She had a lovely girl who is now five months old. But now her Delhi-based husband is behaving very oddly with her. I am disturbed. Why does he not want her and their baby back? She says he can't afford to have her yet as he earns too little. She also constantly fights with him. The whole situation is going out-of-hand to the point where I cannot stand even looking at her, as I resent the way her life has suddenly changed. I've actually become abusive to her as a strategy to get her out of the house and return to her husband's home. Am I being selfish?
- Name withheld on request
Dear Friend,
It's understandable that you do not wantu00a0 things to carry on as they are, and that's fair enough as it concerns your daughter's future. Be calm and have a chat with your daughter.u00a0 Ask her why her husband is behaving like this.u00a0u00a0
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It appears that there is more to it than meets the eye. Get to the truth, tactfully. Her husband is saying he earns too little to support her and the baby. This should have been thought of before the baby's arrival. Tell your daughter not to have unnecessary arguments with him, this is putting him off unnecessarily. Tell him in a clearcut manner, that the baby is his, it is his responsibility to nurture her. You helped during the delivery but now after five months he needs to take his wife home with the baby. It is a happy occasion but it looks like he is messing it up for some reason. Find out from common friends and relatives, what's playing on his mind.
I want to lose weight
Dear Diana,
I will be getting married shortly and want to lose weight soon. I am 24 and weigh 76 kgs. I have been dieting but feel so weak that I can't concentrate at my workplace. My colleague tells me I look sick. I have no time to exercise. Please help
ufffd Alpa
Dear Alpa,
Your colleague is right. Soon you will collapse. You need to consult a dietician for a proper nutritional intake. You don't want to look a sick bride! You don't have time to exercise, so walk briskly, take the stairs and do housework ufffd that's exercise enough!
My guy does not believe in cleanliness
Dear Diana,
My boyfriend does not care about cleanliness. I've tried dropping hints but he does not care. I have gifted him deos, body washes, perfumes. I don't want to call off the relationship, but can't he respect me enough to be clean and neat. How do I explain to him that he often stinks?
ufffd JK
Dear JK,
Body odour can be a real turn-off. Tell him cleanliness is next to godliness. But it's disgusting having someone around who does not care for personal hygiene at all. And it can certainly go against intimate moments. Tell him that "I love you but don't want to be close to you as you smell unpleasant' ufffd it might do the trick. If he still insists, ask him what is the problem in being clean. And what if you were a mess? Would he like it? His answer will be no. Then tell him practice what you preach.
