04 March,2011 09:06 AM IST | | Diana
Dear Diana,
I adore my boyfriend with my whole heart, and we're definitely heading down the serious road. We've been talking about getting married after we get more established. I'm looking forward to that but I have a little problem. He's not the best at compromising.
I hate wasting food. Besides it is expensive!! I work and he doesn't have a job presently. An example of where I'm willing to compromise with him is that I really don't like having a TV in the room where I sleep and he does. I compromised saying that we could get a TV cabinet that I can close when we are ready to turn it off and got to sleep. I compromise, he doesn't. That's not exactly an exciting prospect to me. How do I get him to work with me on the little things I find important?
Bineeta
Dear Bineeta,
I am afraid there is not actually a lot you can do here to change him. He is who he is and that's the way he has been brought up. You will have to learnt to accept each other's little habits, annoying as they may be, and justu00a0 have to deal with them when they come.
If he leaves food out all night and still wants to eat it well then let him. He may break these small habits when he gets older. But the only thing you can really do is be honest with him and tell him how you feel. Also, you may feel that relationships are about compromise, while he feels that in a relationship you should be able to be yourself and be happy.
Neither of your relationship style needs change. Honestly I feel that these are not big deals and if there are big deals that may come up in the relationship there isn't any clue yet as to whether he would adjust to you.
Tired of being alone
Dear Diana,
I'm a 15-year-old guy.u00a0 I live a very boring life. And I have no true friends. Lately I've been getting a real desire tou00a0 be in love, and be loved. I've never been in a relationship, I'm pretty sure I'm gay or bi. I seem to like guys more than girls. It's been hard enough and now I have to deal with this. I used to always be called gay, and used not let my sexuality show so much. I don't know if I'll ever find someone who wants me. I'm tired of being alone What should I do?
Name withheld on request
Dear friend,
Life doesn't start until your mid-20's for most guys. Be patient, study hard, get a good job, and save up some money. Learn to love yourself and others, not because it will make them love you, but because it feels good to do so. Love and good friends don't just crawl out of the woodwork. Join a school club, or sport, or take up a hobby, and make some friends there. Also accept that, as a gay man (man-in-training, I guess, at 15), there will be fewer relationship opportunities for you than for heteros simply because of numbers. Be patient.
Like girl-on-girl scenes but don't think am hay!
Dear Diana,
I'm a 19-year-old girl. I have a boyfriend and in the past too, I've liked other guys. I've slept with one boyfriend once, although I didn't enjoy it, because I was in pain. The thing is: I sometimes wonder what it's like to kiss a girl, like if I see a film and there's a make-out girl scene and I'm like "wow", but I don't think I'm gay. So why do these thoughts come into my head? I don't get it, what's going on? I'm confused.
Name withheld on request
Dear Friend,
What's going on is your a normal 19-year-old!
It is so normal to wonder about sexuality, especially at your age, it does not make you gay in anyway. At some point you may decide that you want to explore these feelings or they may fade away, but neither are anything to worry about. What you are feeling is totally normal basically and trust me lots other people your age feel that way.
