Should Ranbir & Deepika get back?

Ranbir hopes so. Deepika, we aren't sure, considering she's spending her birthday with close friends. But if patching up with your partner is on your agenda, here's a guide to cementing the fissures


After their split, when actor Ranbir Kapoor was asked if he'd like to
get back with girlfriend Deepika Padukone, he said, "I hope so." pic/ AFP

Love conquers all, if only you allow your ego to yield. That's not poetry, just the belief that determined lovers carry. So, even if you have just emerged from an ugly break-up typically characterised by bitterness, there is a chance to set things straight. That is if you want to. But once the trust is gone, how do you rebuild it?
Admit to your mistake: Let your partner know that you regret what happened and despite everything, it doesn't mean that you love them any less.
Take steps to show you can change: Make small but noticeable changes to reassure your partner that you are, in fact, serious about your attempt at rebuilding trust. Try making a positive change to your
personality.u00a0
Ask your partner what's expected of you: Sit your partner down and ask him/her to clearly outline what would work towards rebuilding trust. Consider the changes that you can make in your attitude and routine to get back on track.
Make it up: Focus on the details, the little things that will make a difference to your lover. Slip in a handwritten note into their lunch box on a handmade coupon that entitles them to a free massage. You might initially face some resistance but wait till they warm up to you again.
Be patient: Rebuilding a relationship will require you to play Buddha. You must keep the faith, and wait for things to work out. Trust takes a while to re-build. If you've been the one at fault, patience is key.
See what you can do to set things right: No two people are perfect, and every relationship has its weaknesses. If it was a physical disconnect that drove you apart, have an honest discussion with your partner about how intimacy can make its way back into your relationship.

Free advice for India's youth
It takes incredible patience
Ekta Sharma, Management trainee
Even if you get back with your partner after a split, things will never be the same again. A strange awkwardness will linger. It requires a high level of understanding and patience to mend a broken relationship.
Only love can make it work
Prateek Bhardawaj, MBA student
If it was true love, you will rise above the hurt. Time is a good healer. Give it your best shot. It'll work provided you haven't outgrown the relationship during the split. Stay in contact to avoid that.

Top 5 love breakers
Infidelity: You have heard this word more often than you would want to hear. Even a false hint of disloyalty can suspend the passion.u00a0
Professional killer: You love your work, and so does she. But there's something called work-life balance.
Emotional abuse: Unlike physical exploitation, the scars of emotional agony rarely fade. Get out of the habit of exploiting your partner emotionally.u00a0u00a0u00a0
Interfering parents: Look up to them for advice, but take your own decisions.
Indifference: If the scrap that your partner had at work has left her upset but doesn't seem to bother you, chances are you will be viewed as someone who focuses on individual needs only.

The Famous make-up after they break-up
He married his ex-wife after 5 years!
Director Sanjay Gupta remarried ex-wife Anu Lekhi five years after their divorce. "I have been stalking her all through these five years," admitted Sanjay, to a news daily. As reported by MiD DAY last month, Sanjay is now in the process of building a resort for his wife, and has snapped all contact with his single, female friends.
Shahid-PC's second innings
Priyanka Chopra and Shahid Kapoor are rediscovering the joy of being together after they split last November. The duo headed to Bangkok for a film shoot. During their stay at the same hotel, the love rekindled, sources say. Shahid befriended Priyanka's friend and confidante Tamanna Sharma, who played Cupid second time around.

Try till its workable
Vandana Tara consultant clinical psychologist with Vimhans Hospital
Work on the relationship only if you think it is worth the effort. Keep communication channels open and trust your partner. Chances are that it is going to be an ordeal winning back your partner, but you have to be patient. Think over your decision carefully, and then stick to it. Don't decide on an impulse.

When nothing seems to work, What do you do?
Stay strong. Don't throw yourself a pity party, where you are the only one invited.
Keep yourself busy. Try to do things you've always wanted to do and haven't been able to since you got involved.
Try to leave the house more often. If you hang around in an atmosphere that reminds you of your partner, it won't work.
Try to spend time with family and friends. They have your best interests in mind.