Stuck between an unloving wife and a loving woman...

Dear Diana,
I am 42. I have been in an affair with my coworker for the past 10 years. I wanted to marry her, but my wife refuses to give me a divorce. My lover is now 37 and spent the last 10 years waiting for me to marry her. She does not have any other relations as I was very possessive and I forced her to break them up.

So she cannot leave me either. Both of us cannot work without each other and I cannot bear her pain. I feel guilty that I cannot marry her and this guilt is making it difficult for me to work or sleep. She is ready to stay alone for the rest of her life, but I know it is not possible.

Every festival, she sits alone at home and cries, and it is the same with me. She cannot work without me in a a different company. How do I give her happiness? How do I solve this problem? Is there any way I can marry her?

Name withheld

Dear Friend,
Ten years is a long time. Any court would've granted you divorce if you'd applied for it. Did you just wait for her to agree to the divorce and not sign the papers? You need to consult a goodu00a0 lawyer. Also, you could've moved in with the woman you loved long ago. What stopped you?

Why don't you spend your festivals with her, rather than a wife you has forcefully kept you by her side for a decade? You've been very unfair to the woman who loves you. It's cruel to expect someone to cut off relations with her family because you are posessive.

You've given this woman nothing and she has selflessly loved you and waited for you for ten years. Do right by her.u00a0 Have a final talk with your wife. Tell her you are not happy and want to separate. Tell her thatu00a0 she can have the house, and you will continue to support her but you won't stay with her anymore. After that make an appointment with a lawyer.u00a0u00a0u00a0

My folks are too strict...

Dear Diana,
I am 17. My friends are planning a trip abroad. It would be the first time I will be going abroad, but my parents have refused permission, saying it's not safe. How do I convince them?

Rama

Dear Rama,
I dont blame your parents. In their place, I would've done the same. It is not safe for a bunch of 17-year-olds to travel alone, leave alone going to a strange foreign land. There has been hundreds of cases of girls going missing in foreign countires and never returning home. Listen to your folks.

I dumped him one time too many...

Dear Diana,
I am 15. I was with this guy of the same age for the past six months. Recently I broke up with him for several reasons and I told all of them to him, but he thinks I was lying and I actually never loved him. But I still love him. I realised my mistake and now I need him back. I asked him to fogive me but he was very angry because this was not the first time I have done this. He said he does not want to keep in touch with me and he has lost all trust in me. I am unable to call or text him, and I don't even meet him anymore. What do I do?

Name withheld

Dear Friend,
Obviously the guy is hurting. You've dumped him many times before and then made up with him. He has probably wisened up and doesn't want to see you anymore, because you might leave him again afteru00a0 a few months. He is just protecting himself.

Frankly, I don't know if he will ever forgive you. Anyway, you can keep trying. Maybe if he sees that you really mean it this time and have seen the error of your ways, he might get back with you. But it won't happen overnight. It might take longer than it ever has. You have to be patient and sincere. Let him know you will wait for him. And that you won't behave irrationally next time and split for silly reasons.