Was he cheating on me or just being a control freak?

diana will solve it! Write to Diana at diana@mid-day.com, or fax her on 24150009. You can also post letters to Dear Diana, Mid Day, Peninsula Centre, Dr S S Rao Road, opp Mahatma Gandhi Hospital, Parel, Mumbai 400012

Dear Diana,

Illustration/Sameer Pawar

I am very confused about my relationship. We've been together for more than two years. I have have done a diploma in hospitality and avation.

Since, there were no job opportunities with airlines, I got a job with au00a0 hotel (something he didn't want me taking up).

So he broke up with me (or I couldu00a0 be that another girl came into his life). He insisted we remain friends but that, that would be it.

I refused because I imagined him as my life partner and not as a friend. Because of that argument, we haven't been talking for a month now.

Did I make a mistake two years ago or was he simply fooling around with me? Is there another girl in his life? If there is am if he tells me that was the case, I'd forget about him pronto.

Problem is, he isn't clarifying anything. Also will this relationship hurt our families?
u00a0
Priyanka

Dear Priyanka,

He cannot dictate your career choices. If that's the price to pay for being separated from him, so be it. Too much control is also a bad thing.

He's playing up the 'my way or the highway' tug a little too strongly. If there was really another girl, you'd figure it out sooner.

One would expect him to be ambiguous. It works to his advantage to keep you guessing, so that if you really love him, you'll come running back to him.

Also, since you belong to different religions, your families might object.

In love with my best friend (who's married, BTW)

Dear Diana,

I am 21 and in love with a best friend who's married. Also, her husband works overseas. Should I continue the relationship or break it off and lead a normal life?

Rajan

Dear Rajan,

Well, here's the deal. It's one thing to love someone dearly and totally another to think about providing for her needs and wants by being responsible for her afer breaking up her marriage.

There will be comparisons and several unresolved issues if this matter goes ahead in haste. Moreover, it seems your career is just starting out.

Are you ready for a committed relationship that will see you supporting her for as long as it takes? If the answer to that question is a yes, keep at it. If not, you know what you have to do.

Should I propose (albeit indirectly)?

Dear Diana,

I've loved her for four years now but never prepared myself to propose to her. My friend has offered to tell this girl about my feelings on my behalf, since they've been good friends.

Should I let this friend go ahead as planned? I don't want any scene or any problem created after this, should her parents object. I really love her. What to do?

Name withheld on request

Dear Friend,

That's a very clichu00e9d line: "I really love her." Well, my friend, if you really did love her, you wouldn't wait four years to have precious time (that could've been spent together in her company) slip away doing nothing.

Don't you have a spine just as yet? Don't tell me you're afraid of rejection. That's simply the wrong attitude to have.

Why get a common friend involved in this whole affair? And let's assume it does help your cause, why can't she talk to her parents about you? Won't their consent mean something to her? You gotta be brave about this.