24 September,2018 02:09 PM IST | Mumbai | Suman Mahfuz Quazi
Dhruv Sehga and Mithila Palkar
What is a four-letter word that drives you crazy? Work? Boss? Moms? The possibilities are infinite. On a Sunday night, we huddle around a centre table with dog-eared Taboo cards. But the word 'Love' never shows up. It's hard to explain. So, we find its semblance in literature, songs and movies, and in the dried-up flower pressed together between the pages of a health insurance company's diary, discovered many years later. We find it in stories.
One such story that has seemed to tug at the heartstrings of many is that of on-screen characters Dhruv and Kavya from the popular web series, Little Things. And as the crew gets into fifth gear ahead of the release of its second season on Netflix on October 5, we catch up with Dhruv Sehgal and Mithila Palkar. The reel-life couple helps us decode the A to Z of relationships in 2018.
I give you my love, but you don't care
Youngsters in the 20-to 30-years age bracket are at the forefront of their careers. The pressure is insurmountable and often takes a toll on their sex life. But "aaj mood nahi hain" is not always about work pressure for Palkar.
Mithila Palkar
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"Recently, I was a part of a group where we were discussing how it's important to have sex every week and that wasn't the case with the married couples at the table. So, I think, it also has a lot to do with taking it for granted where married and live-in couples think, 'Chalo, aaj nahi toh kal kar hi lenge.' You have to make time for it," she explains.
Resounding this Sehgal says, "Many things affect your sexual drive. If I am not feeling mentally stable, I won't feel like doing it. It's not always about being career-oriented, so it's wrong to say things like, 'Why the f#@! aren't you having sex with me?'"
I don't know why you're not fair
If the concept of love has evolved, so has the idea of commitment. "Sometimes, people grow out of it. But the important question here is, do you still want to go back home to that person?" Palkar asks, adding, "Today, relationships are complicated, but the beauty lies in finding the simplicity within it."
Dhruv Sehgal and Mithila Palkar discuss relationships. Pics/Sneha Kharabe
Concepts such as polyamory are no longer alien to the Indian youth. We dawdle over whether monogamy is still relevant. "I want it to be relevant!" Palkar exclaims and according to Sehgal, it still is. "It's as relevant as polyamory," he reasons.
What is love?
The way we understand love, has evolved with time. But Palkar struggles with its new-age avatar. "I really don't know what love means to youngsters, ya," she laments, adding, "It's not that I am against it, it's just that I am very old-school so I don't always relate to it." Even on screen, relationships are being portrayed differently, in that they are depictive of modern relationships that celebrate individuality. "Love is a word which is changing and finding its own meaning.
For example, someone I know found his future wife on a dating app. So, in that sense, the concept is interesting now because besides being about two people as a unit, it's also becoming about the respect an individual deserves, demands and should get," Sehgal argues. "There is nothing wrong with thinking individualistically," he elaborates, and Palkar chimes in, "It's about finding a balance."
Baby, don't hurt me
Increasingly, couples have to deal with infidelity. It is even more difficult with live-in couples because walking out entails changing homes and more. Is there space for forgiveness, we inquire? For Palkar, who calls herself a "supreme loyalist", cheating is not an option. Echoing this Sehgal explains, "Love is faith, so when someone cheats they break that faith, too. I think I would have a difficult time forgiving myself, so I can't expect the other person to do it either."
Dhruv Sehgal
Be that as it may, it is not unreal to find yourself attracted to someone else while still in a relationship. In such a situation, both Palkar and Sehgal suggest talking it out. "I mean if you're going on dates with this other person then it doesn't make sense because you're already cheating," Palkar clarifies.
Gimme a sign
The source of a leaked video is often the ex. But many times, it is possible to weed out patterns of bullying while still in the relationship. It's not unnatural to take videos and pictures while being intimate either, so how does one go about it? Palkar thinks it's not that simple, "I would not even think, 'What if he leaks my video?' Especially while I am still with him." Sehgal's response on the other hand is pithy, "Video le lo, par delete kar do."
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