Revenge of the surrogate mom

10 years ago, desperately poor women who rented out their wombs to childless couples were happy with just their fee. Today, they call the shots and hold couples to ransom

10 years ago, desperately poor women who rented out their wombs to childless couples were happy withu00a0 just their fee. Today, they call the shots and hold couples to ransom

Hans Christian Andersen's fairy tale of the Princess who could not sleep because of a pea that had been kept at the bottom of a bed of 40 mattresses is mirrored in this story, except that the princess is an unwed mother, a surrogate mom.

And the pea here is a metaphor for the demands that these women make on the couples for whom they carry the baby.

Who are the Moms?

Surrogate mothers, who come from desperately poor families, are increasingly using the power of the womb over childless couples to demand a better deal for themselves.

Said Dr Duru Shah from a fertility clinic in Kemps Corner, "One surrogate well into the pregnancy suddenly said she wanted her uncomfortable mattress to be changed, and wanted it changed now!



It was extremely hard and lumpy. And she did not give in till it was changed to a better one."

The days when poor surrogates were taken advantage of are fast becoming a thing of the past. Most surrogate mothers at the couple's insistence are housed at apartments to ensure acceptable hygiene levels.

Twin Price

Another city gynaecologist, who refused to be named, recalled how a surrogate woman, who was carrying twins demanded, on the operation table, that the parents pay her double the money they had promised her.
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"She refused to undergo a Caesarean. When the couple pleaded with her and argued that it was unfair to renege on the contract, the woman simply stormed out of the delivery room, and could only be persuaded to return after she was paid what she was asking for," said another city gynaecologist.

However, gynaecologists also add that even though this is a rising trend, this is not the norm.

ALL'S WELL: Haresh and Niketa Calcuttawala with their one-year-old Parth. The couple's surrogate never gave them any reason to complain

Childless couples who have benefited from surrogacy, however, feel that all negative experiences are dwarfed by the joy that parenthood brings.

Haresh (38) and Niketa Calcuttawala (37) had three miscarriages before they decided to hire a surrogate from Anand in Gujarat. The Thane couple is very happy with their decision.

"With the money we paid the surrogate mother, she made a down payment on her house and bought her husband a rickshaw, which is their only source of livelihood.

Our son Parth (1) is healthy. Our surrogate never gave us any reason to complain," said Haresh.

Healthy, Wealthy

Dr Nayana Patel, medical director of a fertility clinic in Anand, Gujarat, said she made all surrogate mothers working with her undergo a three-level clearance procedure so such problems do not crop up.
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"About 40 women apply with us every month to become surrogates. We analyse their character and refuse 25 per cent of the applicants because they are found wanting.

It is very important that in the end neither the couple nor the surrogate mother feel they have been cheated," said Patel, who has nearly 150 surrogates working with her.

Do you know?

The Indian Society for Assisted Reproduction is organising the Ovary Unravelled Conference-2009 in Mumbai from December 11 to 13 that will focus on surrogate motherhood, among other things.

Legal surrogacy first came to being in the early 1980s at a clinic in Michigan

Commercial surrogacy has been legal in India since 2002

Rs 2 Lakh
Approximate amount that surrogate mothers earn for carrying a baby to term

Rs 5 Lakh
Amount paid by foreign couples to surrogate mothers in India

45
Maximum age for a surrogate mother under Indian law

3
Maximum number of times an Indian can be a surrogate

It's In The Bible!

Surrogacy can be traced back to biblical times, where Abraham's wife Sarah was unable to conceive and, hence, made her slave girl Hagar sleep with Abraham. They conceived a child Ishmael. Surrogacy controversies In 1986, when baby Melissa Stern or Baby M was locked in an American custody case between the surrogate mother and the couple. The surrogate mother Mary Whitehead carried the baby to term, but then demanded that the baby be returned to her. She threatened to end her life, if she was not given the child. The couple was finally awarded custody.u00a0 In India, last month, a German couple employed the services of a surrogate in Gujarat and got caught in a legal tangle. When the twins were born, the parents approached court to grant the babies Indian citizenship, as German laws do not acknowledge surrogacy as a valid means of parenthood. The couple's petition, u00a0however, was challenged by the Central government, u00a0which argued that the surrogate mother could u00a0not be considered as the parent and, hence, Indian citizenship could not be granted to the baby.