Mind your own beeswax

Last weekend, I was minding my own business, like a decent Bhartiya nagrik in a multiplex, howling on my phone in the middle of this angrez director's lucid dream wali film called Inception. Suddenly, a kurta-clad aunty interrupted, "Young man, don't you think you should lower your volume a bit?"

Offended by her uncouth behaviour, I went to a bar and asked the bartender to supply nonstop jugs of cheap beer while I mentally stripped lingerie off the ladies in the bar when the manager poked his nose in. "Sir, you shouldn't be doing that or you'll be in trouble," he warned.

This is what the world has come to. One just lands up in trouble for minding his own business because nobody else is minding theirs. Look, what has happened to the poor Pakistani cricket team captain and his teammates. They were blissfully practising their no balls and exchanging money-laden blazers with bookies as a sign of good sportsmanship and suddenly they ended up in a controversy called 'spot fixing'. Now, from Sunil Gavaskar to Sharad Pawar, everybody is butting in, into their private affair.

Many others are being uselessly harassed by the same inquisitiveness. The opposition, media, and even the aam janta wants to know from Mr. Kalmadi how a single chair can cost Rs. 8,378. Such thriftiness on everybody's part when Rs. 2,394 crore is the total budget sanctioned to the CWG organising committee. Then they keep asking Omar Abdullah why the Kashmiri youth is throwing stones in the streets. Now, how can he answer that, being only the CM of Jammu and Kashmir. So, the questions are endless: Mr. Warren Anderson, why did you make moolah manufacturing industrial chemicals and killing a few thousand Indians in the process? Dear Rathodji, why did Ruchika commit suicide? Fransisco (Mickey) Pacheco, what happened between you and Nadia Torrado?

Suddenly, we have evolved into an intrusive society. RTIs are being filed and every trifle issue interests us.u00a0 Film makers won't let farmers commit suicide in peace and want to sensitise us about their plight when we are so happy enjoying our heroines flaunting their size zero figures.

u00a0But there is still no reason to panic. No matter how hard they try, we can mine as much as we want, grab land from poor farmers, destroy media offices, hold a city to ransom, and beat up alcohol consuming women in pubs to our heart's content...