The nuptial expectations

A couple of days ago, Rahul Mahajan's wannabe brides on Rahul Dulhaniya Le Jayega visited his home and family. As Mahajan showed them how 'good' the bed in his room was, the view, two of the three simpered, blushed and giggled (what are they? 20? Umm yeah, they're 20, 21 and 25). But that wasn't what bothered me, but their individual meetings with Mahajan's mum. Each of the would-be bahus addressed Mahajan's mother as 'Aaeee', and offered themselves up as doormats. "Shaadi ke baad jaisa Rahul chaahega, waise hoga," said one while the other sang the tune of "Aap mujhe sikhaayengi na, aapke parivaar ke taur-tareeke?" Didn't think such girls existed in the world outside the saas-bahu shows.

This reminded me of a similar scenario a month ago. It was a guy's parents-come-to-see-girl meeting, the girl being me, a cliched film scene. And whatever followed was a cliche. I was asked if I could cook (it's most important remarked the boy's mamma), if I could make a rangoli, or I'd grow my hair longer. I remember my parents being as shocked as me at the fact that such people still existed in our 'urbane' world. There wasn't a word we managed to get in, or even ask about the son (whose presence was purely symbolic: his photograph placed proudly on our dining table).u00a0

None of the issues regarding blending into the household, adjustments, problems or expectations are ever addressed to a guyu00a0I guess such parents do exist and such girls too... probably each exists because the other does, it's a vicious circle. I personally have nothing against those who are in love with the idea of being married, 'blending' into the household and so on. What gets to me is how none of these issues are ever addressed to the guy. Sure, Mahajan visited four of the finalists' parents and was asked about his divorcee and celebrity (ha ha) status. But did he talk of adjustment or being exactly how the girl wanted him to? Did the girls' parents tell him what their expectations were? Even in Rakhi Ka Swayamwar, it was Rakhi who asked prospective grooms' parents if they had a problem with her working as an item girl after marriage, how she'd become one with their family and so on.

That said, I must mention that one of the contestants of Rahul Dulhaniya Le Jayega, Nikunj Malik, was honest enough to say that the idea of a joint family scared her. Predictably, this confession was played against a thundering background score, individual shots of the other two girls smirking and a gaping Mahajan. Disapproval of course. What's the bet he's not going to pick her? But someone tell her she's better off that way.