A misunderstanding made us drift apart

diana will solve it! Write to Diana at diana@mid-day.com, or fax her on 24150009. You can also post letters to Dear Diana, Mid Day, Peninsula Centre, Dr S S Rao Road, opp Mahatma Gandhi Hospital, Parel, Mumbai 400012

Dear Diana,

I was in a seven-year relationship with a seven-year-older guy. He's my cousin. Due to some misunderstanding created by a common friend, I broke up with my guy without informing him. I started hating him and in anger, accepted the proposal of another guy who loved me a lot.

Illustration/Satish Acharya

I tried my best to make myself fall in love with him and forget my previous relationship, but I failed. I later learned the truth about why the common friend broke us up.

Now I realise I love my first boyfriend (who's also my cousin). I am dying to talk to him and clear up everything. But I don't have the guts to speak to him.

I think he hates me and doesn't want to talk to me because of my past behaviour. A few days back, I learned from the same friend who broke us up that he's in a relationship with a colleague.

I don't want to believe him. And should I tell my current boyfriend I don't love him?

Miss Confused

Dear Friend,

I don't think you deserve a guy like your first boyfriend. You didn't even give him a chance to defend himself against allegations made by a third party. Why should he wait around for you, when you chose to move on, without even giving him the courtesy of a mention. You've realized matters too late. Not too late to say you're sorry though. It's never too late to make amends for wha you've done. And you're still on talking terms with this common 'friend'?? Don't you learn from your mistakes?

Should I propose, again?

Dear Diana,

We've been best friends for three years now. I had proposed to her after I broke off with my ex three months back. She told me that she always liked me, but didn't know or feel that she loved me. There was no problem in our friendship after this. Lately, when we met, she had a crush on me. On messaging her, she is giving me hints that she likes me... Should I propose to her again? What if my assumptions turn out to be wrong after proposing to her again?

Name withheld on request

Dear Friend,

Maybe, she has made up her mind. And is waiting for you to make your move. Maybe she's ready to fall in love and to say yes. If the hints are too apparent, propose to her. What have you got to lose. She likes you and it's not like she's going to stop because you proposed to her once. Propose to her in a way that she'll remember all her life. It wouldn't hurt to try, try till you succeed, no?

My height's a problem!

Dear Diana,

My height is a major problem with me. I am not confident because I am short and get treated like a kid wherever I go. When I propose to girls, they don't take me seriously. What should I do?

Jitu

Dear Jitu,

How old are you? I'm sure you'll grow a bit taller as the years pass. And in stead of crying over your height, you should build your confidence in telling yourself that people should accept you as you are. If they cannot, they don't deserve to be with you. Improve your attitude. Let the deeds you do increase your stature, not inches.