02 May,2011 08:07 AM IST | | Diana
Dear Diana,
I'm 19 and me and my boyfriend and I have been dating eight months. We have a strong relationship but he gets all mad and jealous if I talk to other boys as friends. Also he gets mad when I have plans with my friends. He always says they're more importantu00a0 than he is and it's anoying sometimes. I'm allowed to have friends too. I love hanging with my bf but I also try hanging with my friends so my parents don't say I'm ditching them cause I have a bf or say I'm too serious with him. I thnk I'm doing the right thing?
Dear Friend,
Your boyfriend is immature and insecure -- not uncommon at his age but it's really not healthy for you to be controlled by a jealous boyfriend.You SHOULD be hanging out with your friends, you SHOULD be maintaining all your relationships, not just the one with him. He's important, of course, but if he can't handle the fact that you have other people you like to be with, then he's WAY too immature and needs to do some growing up. Your friends are just as important as he is and if you ditch them and then you and he split up you would have no one. He needs to grow up a bit and check out how real relationships work. Keep making plans with your friends and if he doesn't like it, show him the door. Life's too short to put up with someone being so jealous like that.
Why will a 'happily married' man cheat?
Dear Diana,
Will a married man cheat if he is truly happy at home? As cheating I mean carrying on an emotional and physical relationship for over nine years?
Name withheld
Dear Friend,
Most couples cheat to satisfy some longing for adventure or something else missing in the marriage. Truly happy people don't search and usually don't cheat unlessu00a0 coerced. If they give in because they "can get away with it", they probably were having problems to begin with.
Ask this married man out... for coffee?
Dear Diana,
I am friendly with a married man. Our sons go to karate together. We talk a lot when we see each other twice a week. He always seeks me out for a chat and seems to enjoy my company. I enjoy his company as well. Would it be okay for me to ask him out for coffee?
Name withheld
Dear Friend,
"Ask out"? Why? He has coffee at home if he's thirsty and a wife if he needs a friend. If you want to buy him coffee, fine, do that when you meet up normally. It's strange that you are asking. I got male friends who are married, and male friends that are in relationships. There's nothing wrong with being friends with a married man, but usually coffee doesn't happen. If you go somewhere together it's usually totally unplanned, unforeseen and innocent. I think you should leave it well enough alone. I can't imagine your intentions being in the right place if you are trying to push the friendship into something more private and exclusive between the two of you. It's how it would appear to others anyway and to him.