My berozgaar BF lied to me once. Is he doing it again?

Dear Diana,
I am a 20-year-old girl. I am a college student and work as a chartered accountant. I have been having an affair with a guy for the past five years. The problem is that my boyfriend doesn't have a job. When-ever I tell him to get one, he says he will, but doesn't.

We've been fighting on this issue for a long time now. He said that he will get a job after we get married, but how can I believe him? So, finally, I broke up with him. Five months later, he called me and said he had got a job. He had told me that earlier toou00a0-- it was a lie thenu00a0-- how can I believe him now? What should I do?

Name withheld

Dear Friend,
What hurts you most is that if you can hold a job and study at the same time and cannot understand why this guy cannot do the same. It would seem that he's either plain lazy or has been putting it off until later. In any case, it's not a good trait and you will not want a future husband who will live off your earnings.
If you are keen on maintaining a relationship with this guy, believe him and give him another chance. If you have had enough, just ignore him.

Besides, it will be some time before you think seriously of geting married. When you do, marry someone you can trust and who holds a job or has his own business. The point I'm making here is that he should be able to provide for his own needs and for yours. He cannot do that without a source of income.

Romance makes me a sissy?

Dear Diana,
My girlfriend dumped me when she realised I love romantic books. She says boys should stick to graphic novels or non-fiction and reading romances makes me a sissy. I can't believe she could generalise like that. How can I convince her?

Akash

Dear Akash,
Honestly, most girls would think a guy reading romance novels is a sissy. But dumping a guy for that is a bit extreme. Maybe if you told her that you've graduated to hardcore stuff now, she might change her mind. Or tell her you are pumping iron and doing macho stuff, maybe then she'd reconsider.

How do I convince my parents?

Dear Diana,
I am 24. I've been dating the guy I love for the past two-and-a half years. We are committed to each other. My family is not accepting our marriage as my guy is from a different religion. Both of us tried to convince them but they don't want to listen to us at all.

His family likes me very much and wants us to get married. My guy really loves me a lot and I am happy to be with him. I tried to explain this to my parents but they are not convinced. I don't want to hurt them and don't want to lose my love. What should I do?

Name withheld

Dear Friend,
Listen, you're old enough to understand that they would be cool with dating but not marriage. It's not like you guys didn't see this coming. You have to understand that you know your parents best and should know by now that you will have to hurt them or lose your love.

You can't have it both ways. I'm being realistic here. If they haven't been convinced yet, you can keep trying and hope they relent or realise it's a lost cause (sooner the better).u00a0 Either way, tough choices have to be made and if you are not up to it, I suggest you pick a side and stick around.