This trip might be the end of the road with my fiancee

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Dear Diana,

Illustration/Sameer Pawar

I am 21 and have been in a relationship with a girl for the past three years. We've been engaged for two years now. There is this another girl (a great friend of mine for last seven months). We were friends before that but my fiancee didn't like me talking to her as it was mostly late nights.

One day, my fiancee called this other girl and told her not to call me ever again. I tried to tell my fiance that she is just a friend but she didn't listen to me once. Once my fiancee and I were fighting the whole week. We didn't talk to each other at all.

I got drunk and was feeling low so I called up the other girl whose is now a very close friend and talked for the whole night. That night, I came to know that she has feelings for me.

A few days back, she told me she loved me. We have been planning to out on a trip together for a long time and now finally the trip has been finalised but I am having second thoughts.

I want to go but am scared that if anybody comes to know, especially my fiancee, I will lose her and I don't want to. I'm attracted to this girl but don't have any strong feelings for her.

She knows everything about me and she also has a boyfriend (who doesn't like me talking to her). I am overwhelmed with conflicting feelings. Should I go on this trip or not?

Prat

Dear Prat,

It's but natural that your girlfriend will feel threatened by another girl's presence in your life and will tend to be possessive of you. You really can't blame her for feeling that way.

Taking this trip will also be a bad idea as the fact that you are taking one with the girl in question has been concealed from everyone you know, especially your fiancee, who by your own admission you'd rather be with.
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Nothing might really 'happen' on this trip an you might be on your best behaviour throughout but she will never be able to trust you again. A betrayal is a betrayal and you can't get away with that.

She's 15 and I wanna marry her!

Dear Diana,

I am 25 and have fallen for my neighbour, a 15-year-old.We stare and smile at each other but never get to talk. We'd stand on our doorsteps and look at each other.

This continued for a week or so; after which, her guardians got to know about that and stopped her from doing even that. This went on for three months.

And I'd even wait outside her school for a chance to talk to her! Now, I have gotten a visa and will be off to Dubai shortly. I haven't seen her for six months now.

I love her wholeheartedly and we even belong to the same religion. I'd like to marry her. Her folks are rich. What should I do?

Name with held

Dear Friend,

She's a minor and you could get into trouble for simply trying to even talk her parents into marriage. You're a good deal older and should know better than to pursue a girl who you haven't even spoken to.

She might not even know you, let alone be in love with you. Pursue your career doggedly and make a name of yourself in stead of hanging around a minor like a lovelorn Romeo. It's for the best that you don't see her too often.

She's a divorcee. Will that be a problem?

Dear Diana,

I am 38 and a bachelor. I recently met a 38-year-old woman on a matrimonial website. She is very attractive and I intend to marry her if things work out.

Can her marital status (she is a divorcee with two kids) cause any problems in our marital life in future?

Sonu

Dear Sonu,

What ought to matter, ideally, is compatibility.u00a0u00a0 If the two of you get along and can live with each other's insecurities and are ready to be involved in a marriage as a learning process, you will do just fine.

If her children don't warm up to you, though, it could be a problem.