'I am the Pink Sheep'

Mahesh Natarajan's first book Pink Sheep is all about being gay and leading a normal life in India; more importantly, it doesn't try to push any issue under the pink carpet

There is nothing queer about being queer, is what Mahesh Natarajan says in his first book Pink Sheep. Natrajan, a software engineer with a degree in management and a practicing counselor brings in a collection of 18 stories, which are set in a matter-of-fact tone with a narrative that looks at alternative sexuality as a natural phenomenon. The characters of all the stories are people you meet everyday. Their lifestyle, emotions and approach towards life are hardly different from any heterosexual individual. In fact, Pink Sheep may act as an eye opener for all those, who consider gay men to be a group of effeminate beings sporting bright clothes and always speaking of life being unjust.

However, Pink Sheep is not an intellectual masterpiece. Written in a simple language, it talks about how being gay is a part and nothing else changes in life. Natarajan, who grew up in various towns in Tamil Nadu successfully brings out what happens when the realisation that you are different dawns upon you and your parents. But thankfully, there is no melodrama in describing how small town, middle-class educated parents react to their only son being a homosexual, thereby making Pink Sheep a subtle, sensitive, balanced and enjoyable read. In a free flowing chat, the Bangalore-based Natarajan spoke to us about being the pink sheep of his family as well as your average Joe next door.

Why have you laid such stress on how small town parents accept your sexuality?
Somewhere, I am a small town boy at heart. While a large number of gays/ lesbians (more so for transgenders) have enormous challenges to come out, it is also true that there is a lot more acceptance than one sees. In keeping with our Indian culture, the acceptance is understated, mellow and deeply personal. For many people, the simplicity of our faith in the goodness of our gods and the steadfastness of our love is enough to know that our children are being true to themselves, being who they are and that their being gay is not a commentary on one's parenting skills.

Was it a conscious effort?
The non-stereotypical gay man doesn't get noticed as much by the mainstream, but we are around -- we are your regular boy-next-door types, your architects, doctors & IT folk, your friends andu00a0 brothers. It was not a conscious effort to portray one or the other.

Why the name Pink Sheep?
Well, actually, it is homage to a popular Pride Slogan that goes "I am the Pink Sheep of the family." All the stories break the general stereotypes about gay.

How much of Mahesh is there in the characters?
There is a lot of my world in it. The Tam-Bram (Tamilian Brahmin) bits, depictions of uncles and aunties, brothers and sisters, friends etc all draw from people in my life and yes, some of the stories build on kernels of what happened with me.

Which is your favourite story and why?
I love all of them. But Nothing Changes, the last one is one of my favourites. In addition to being a story of coping with loss, to me it is also a story of realising that nothing else changes just because one is gay. One still lives in the same world, dealing with traffic, work, home and other things.u00a0

Pink Sheep, Mahesh Natarajan, Gyana Books, Rs 165. Available at leading bookstores across the city.

Extracts, Page 32
A few years back, after my brother got married, my parents started talking to me seriously about my marriage. I skirted around the topic for months, till they finally lost patience. One day, when were in a car driving down to the family temple, they cornered me and demanded to know why I was so resistant to marriage.u00a0

'You should know,' I protested.u00a0 'I don't have to spell out everything! You have seen how I live; you know my friends. You know I live with Vijay. You can't not know. You are not blind."

A stunned silence later my father said, 'I didn't want to ask.'