How I didn’t make my trip

This is the story of a foolish man who tried to book two plane tickets and ended up paying the price of three Needless to add I was that idiot My folly was booking through an online travel company which recently replaced all human interactions with an inane AI chatbotI needed a ticket to go from Bangkok to Mumbai on October 8 tomorrow The companyrsquos cheapest fare R11518 was from IndiGo masters of the art of the addon I feel lucky sometimes that takeoff and landing are not optional addonsI noticed a button below the website header with the words lsquoZero Cancellation Feersquo Who wouldnrsquot select it I didOnce Irsquod picked my flight I was bombarded with pages of options in small print sometimes with asterisks footnotes and frightening words like ldquoTampC applyrdquoFirst I was informed that I would pay nearly the entire cost of the ticket or Rs 11219 if I cancelled my ticket However by paying an extra Rs 4114 to buy Cancellation Protection I could ensure a 100 per cent refund provided I cancelled at least 24 hours before the flightSince Irsquod already checked that lsquoZero Cancellation Feersquo box I moved onFor Rs 966 I could change my dates for free saving up to Rs 6295 in penalties Old tactic scare you with a big number to make you pay a smaller one PassWould I like priority checkin and anytime boarding for Rs 946 I pass Airports are among the few places where I exploit my senior citizen status to get all kinds of preferential priority treatment I once beat a giant queue and got offered a free wheelchair by whispering to the airline worker that if I stood at a spot too long I tended to throw up violentlyLetrsquos talk about Bombai Click the QR code above to join my WhatsApp group to share your Bombai stories for my bookmdashand perhaps answer some of my Bombai questionsMore offers came and went pay extra and book a seat a meal flight delay protection lost baggage protection a forex service Pass pass pass on everything By now I just wanted it over withI had also forgotten the little lsquoZero Cancellation Feersquo checkbox Irsquod opted for at the beginning This is what humans do They forget stuff and make mistakes when theyrsquore overwhelmed by choices and optionsWhen I was presented with a bill for Rs 19262 I paid it quite uncritically It was only when I booked the return ticket and saw its cost mdash only R12181 mdash that I went on red alert Why had the going ticket cost me Rs 7000 more A quick invoicecheck showed that they had added on something called a Convenience Fee about R2000 though it wasnrsquot clear for whom it was convenient Another Rs 5000 or so had been tacked on for that Zero Cancellation Fee So not zero after all they were merely collecting 50 per cent of the ticket price in advanceThis was when things began going sharply south Desperate to cancel my ticket and rebook it without that zerocancellation I clicked the Cancel Ticket button on the booking website It asked for the booking ID and I made my second mistake mdash I pasted the return flightrsquos IDAlarmed by my own ineptitude I looked for a support page where I could talk to an agent and correct my mistake But all the company has now is a silly brainless chatbot I asked it how I could reach a human agent and it froze displaying the message Calling support agent Nothing happened I frantically texted the companyrsquos WhatsApp site Please cancel my cancellation request That too alas was a dehumanised zoneHerersquos why the company is guilty of deception An ethical userfriendly service would have builtin high tolerance for human error and given users ways to step back from accidental clicks or incorrect choices mdash especially for something as costly as a cancellation They ought to contact the customer to reconfirm the cancellation Are you sure you want to cancelThis firm couldnrsquot cancel my ticket fast enough Within an hour theyrsquod refunded the price mdash minus about Rs 2500 I lost they wonThe company gave the game away today messaging me on WhatsApp that Irsquod be able to call a customer support agent with a heartbeat and a voice directly starting 48 hours before the flightIn other words speaking to a human is now another addon featureWhat can you learn from my illadvised escapade1 Avoid middlemen when you buy tickets Use Google Travel to explore routes airlines and fares Check hidden taxes limits and boundaries and validity dates Then buy directly from the airline2 Donrsquot click something because it says you can change your mind later You wonrsquot3 Distrust websites that dazzle and befuddle you with multiple choices Endless options is not a benefit Itrsquos a trap4 Avoid services whose only support service is an AI chatbotThe IndiGo website was clean uncluttered and lucid I could have booked the same ticket there for R988 less I would have got zero cancellation fees up to 24 hours before the flight by just paying Rs 999 not Rs 4114And hallelujah no Convenience Fee added on at checkout time Just allround convenienceYou can reach C Y Gopinath at cygopigmailcomSend your feedback to mailbagmiddaycomThe views expressed in this column are the individualrsquos and donrsquot represent those of the paper