How kids are affected by complex insecurities and challenges in the digital age

Times have changed Kids today are growing up in a world that looks nothing like the one their parents knew mdash where every playground has an algorithm every classroom has a distraction and every mirror holds up an impossible standardTheyrsquore the first generation to be raised entirely in the glow of smartphones social media and relentless information They learn fast mdash sometimes too fast mdash yet stumble through pressures no child should face alone For these kids the rules have changed and childhood is far from simpleBe it dealing with bullies sharing their lives on social media being attractive to the opposite sex and dealing with serious issues such as ADHD ndash children at school have much more than just acing exams on their mindlsquoADHD makes things complicatedrsquoAaria Varma student and aspiring podcaster 16 attends Dhirubhai Ambani SchoolWhen Aaria Varma was twelve a simple struggle with maths tables turned into something bigger ldquoI was finding it difficult to focus during my lessons My parents sensed my struggle and took me to a therapistrdquo she shares The diagnosis mdash Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder ADHD and dyscalculia mdash made sense of the chaos in her mind ldquoI began to identify trends mdash my lack of ability to sustain attention being impulsive bursts of emotions feeling restless that never seemed to abaterdquoPICKIRTI SURVE PARADESchool wasnrsquot easy ldquoI would space out miss directions and have trouble getting things done in time The stress often resulted in anxietyrdquo Aaria admits Home didnrsquot feel easier either mdash ldquoI couldnrsquot even explain it myself which made it frustratingrdquo But instead of being silenced by it Aaria found her voice Her podcast ZenZ was born from this restlessness ldquoMy own personal experiences led me to start this platform a safe space where teenagers feel understood and less alonerdquoToday she manages her ADHD with therapy grounding techniques and a determination to be gentler with herself ldquoADHD makes things complicated but I tell myself itrsquos alright to take a second reboot and attempt againrdquo ldquoUnlike our parents wersquore growing up in a world where selfworth is constantly being measured in public through likes shares comments and algorithms Every post feels like a performance and comparison becomes second nature It influences the way we view ourselves the way we interact with others and even the way we measure success Our parents didnrsquot have to navigate life while also curating online personas or living through 247 access to othersrsquo filtered lives Whatrsquos more challenging is that although these pressures are incredibly real theyrsquore usually belittled by adults as shallow or unrealrdquolsquoI was bullied for being a creatorrsquoArchit Meher influencer 22 attended one of Mumbairsquos elite schools at 14Archit Meher went viral two weeks when he spoke about the sexual assault case that surfaced in Mumbai at an elite SoBo school A 40yearold former teacher was arrested for sexually assaulting a male student and confessed to the police that she is still in love with the boy He spoke about the bullying and toxic atmosphere at the school that he attended when he was 14 He is currently 22 and an influencer on Instagram Back when he started though at school he was just making videos for fun Fun it was not though when he faced severe bullying for his videos from his classmates ldquoThey classmates made fake accounts and said really terrible things that no kid should hear at that age really mean things A group of five or six guys would team up against me and say awful stuffrdquo he saysArchit Meher attended a highly prestigious school in Mumbai and was bullied for being a content creator PICINSTAGRAMARCHITMEHERldquoEven some teachers seemed oddly invested in my personal life My Technical Drawing Applications teacher in particular kept tabs on my YouTube channel and travel commenting on it to other students It felt intrusive and inappropriate They had a knack for publicly humiliating kids Itrsquos like they werenrsquot equipped to deal with kids And these are senior teachers Irsquom talking aboutrdquo he saysTeachers would run tuitions outside of school favouring those students who would come to those classes ldquoWhen I complained to these same teachers they did nothing because these kids went to their tuition Their parents were paying teachers for extra classes so they just ignored it They enabled this behaviour That bullying was wrong mdash it shouldnrsquot happen because it causes kids to take their lives or face lifelong mental trauma They claim to be antibullying but thatrsquos just on paper I never saw any actionrdquo he saysldquoThe kids the bullies are the same people who text me now asking me if I remember them now that I am successful Itrsquos just crazyrdquo he continues ldquoSome teachers would join in when students made fun of others There was a pattern of public shaming These were senior educators mdash people we were supposed to look up to Instead of protecting us they contributed to the problemrdquolsquoThese kids are born with golden spoonsrsquoShweta Kaushal 43 cofounder Creatorcult Media single mother of a 12yearoldShweta Kaushal runs a young influencer marketing agency Creatorcult Media from her home in Kolkata mdash a choice shaped by her biggest responsibility her 12yearold daughter Shersquos a media professional with over 18 years of experience in the industry ldquoThe reason why I started Creatorcult was that I wanted to work from home and take care of my child as wellrdquo she saysShweta KaushalKaushal finds that the ability to say no to children is gone now Whether out of respect or fear kids of previous generations could never gather the courage to disobey their parents She says ldquoAt our age when we were kids when our parents said anything that was it And they our parents used to negotiate with negative reinforcement But nowadays these children arenrsquot really exposed to negative reinforcementrdquoBeing a single mother also poses its unique challenges ldquoThough I work from home she sees that her mother is always at home but constantly either on the laptop or on the mobile So the child also sees that the parent is busy And when you are a working mother kids often pick up and become even more responsible So I feel shersquos very responsible for her agerdquoWhen asked what makes this generation particularly unique she says ldquoShersquos more educated in terms of what to eat and what not to eat Even if shersquos buying a packet of chips she checks the ingredients The lsquoLabel Padhega Indiarsquo thing has also contributed to that But theyrsquore very conscious very intelligent and they take good care of themselvesrdquoldquoThese kids are born with golden spoons They havenrsquot seen the struggles of their parents I have seen my parentsrsquo struggle so I know where they came from My daughter hasnrsquot seen my struggle In some ways she has seen as a single parent what Irsquove gone through so they become very empatheticrdquoSo whatrsquos the solution then Kaushal opines ldquoThat attachment that physical touch and bonding is very important That parentchild bond is missing these days Though I work from 10 to seven at home Irsquove made it a point not to keep a school bus for her I make it a point to drop her to school and in the afternoon I pick her up There is some way or other you need to find to spend time with your child and make that bond no matter how busy you arerdquolsquoThese kids use collagen at 13rsquoJyotsna Mohan 52 journalist and author of lsquoStoned Shamed Depressedrsquo mother of a 16yearold and a 13yearoldJyotsna Mohanrsquos aforementioned book is an explosive account of the secret lives of Indian teens which was published in 2020 She says ldquoEven the book I wrote is mild compared to whatrsquos going on with Gen Alpha frankly These kids arenrsquot even teenagersrdquoJyotsna MohanMohan is herself a mother of a 16yearold and a 13yearold ldquoThe challenges theyrsquore facing are heightened by the lack of support in schools in terms of mental health We donrsquot think a 10yearold has a mental health issue mdash but the exposure is even quicker than their elder siblings Irsquom not just talking about Netflix Look at the whole trend of Sephora babiesrdquoldquoSephora babiesrdquo refers to tween age children who are obsessed with buying makeup and skin care which is often criticised by netizens as being inappropriate for their age ldquoAnd I have to wonder mdash itrsquos not like a 10yearold can afford that stuff So where are the parents in this Theyrsquore using collagen mdash something someone like me at 50 should be using Irsquove been to plenty of Sephoras and seen children walking around with basketsrdquoldquoThis generation has forgotten childhood or wersquove let them forget it Thatrsquos the crux of the problem Wersquore not allowing them to grow up the way they should Therersquos ample time for them to do protein or go to the gym or do their makeup but wersquove created this urgency to grow uprdquoWhen asked how she feels about children becoming content creators she says ldquoItrsquos outlandish A child hits it big makes money but where does it go Itrsquos ambitious parents behind it I wouldnrsquot allow my kids to do it Kids are on Snapchat at 10 11 itrsquos a platform I cannot standrdquo Snapchat is infamous for being a NSFW platform or in this case not safe for childrenlsquoThey all hide finstas from their parentsrsquoRuchita Dar Shah 48 ran a motherrsquos community for 13 years mother of a 16yearold and a 20yearoldRuchita Dar Shah is a mother of two sons one of whom is still a teenager With her experience in running a motherrsquos community Shah has learnt a lot about parenting ldquoThe exposure these kids have at a young age is crazy Your child could be watching a normal YouTube video and in the click of a few links they are somewhere they really shouldnrsquot be They learn about these very adult things very early onrdquoRuchita Dar Shah along with her kidsShah also warns of unexpected ways in which children might become vulnerable to stranger danger ldquoYou may think theyrsquore just playing a video game but there are strangers they are speaking to on those video games adults who pretend to be their age and may lure them in doing or meeting them in the real worldrdquoKids of today are also extremely tech savvy with a knack to deceive parents who are not able to keep up with the rapid advancement of technology Dar says ldquoParents tell me all the time lsquoMy child is not on social media They would tell me if they werersquo Of course they are They all have these lsquospamrsquo accounts They follow their kids on their main account which is just for showrdquoShah shares some advice for parents ldquoAlso accept the fact that certain things the child will always hide from you Your child might have a very different social media persona but having trust is important and building resilience in the early years will help them deal with online issues in their teenage yearsrdquo she continues ldquoShare your failures so they do the same Meet them where they are for example me and my boys share Reels on Instagram because thatrsquos where they are spending their time So sometimes if I have to give them a message about something that irks me or their behaviour a Reel about mom and son relationship might do a better job of sending the messagerdquo