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Masturbation or sex, what turns her on?

Updated on: 26 December,2012 01:55 PM IST  | 
MiD DAY Correspondent |

Orgasmic experience differs. Some women experience orgasms and dont know it

Masturbation or sex, what turns her on?

Some dont experience orgasm in the sense of feeling their pelvic floor muscles contract. However, they reach a peak of arousal after which they feel relaxed and content. By contrast, women who get very aroused and dont experience orgasm could feel nervous or experience discomfort in their pelvis.


1. A womans sexual feelings can be every bit as strong as that of any man. Her clitoris contains as many nerves as the head of a mans penis, but in a much smaller area, so, the sensations she feels there are more intense.

Sex and relationships, women and orgasms


2. Only about a third of women experience orgasm regularly during intercourse. One third can reach orgasm with intercourse but need extra stimulation. One in three never achieve orgasm during intercourse, but can, by manual and oral stimulation. Having orgasms by means other than intercourse is a normal variation of female sexuality.


3. You are not a bad lover if your woman does not orgasm. While there are many ways a partner can help a woman reach orgasm, in the end, a woman is responsible for her own sexual pleasure.

4. If you think women always like it hard and fast, you are wrong. They may seldom complain about their partners being otherwise. However, they love to feel connected with their partners and like tenderness and slow, gentle touching all over their body.

5. About two-thirds of women masturbate at some time in their lives. They may engage in self-pleasuring whether they have a partner or not. Most women experience orgasms through masturbation, and research indicates that these orgasms tend to be more physically intense than those they experience with a partner. This is probably because his absence lets them focus on their own pleasure. Many women have their first orgasm through masturbation.

6. Whether they normally have orgasms or not, women can be very satisfied without an orgasm. On the other hand, a woman who has an orgasm may be satisfied physically, but not emotionally. The best way to determine whether your partner is satisfied is to ask her how she is feeling and whether there is anything she needs or wants.

7. Vaginal orgasms may not always be better than clitoral orgasms. The clitoris is always involved in triggering orgasms in women, though they may experience orgasms that feel different from each other.

The clitoris extends much further into the body than originally thought, and this may be the reason why women sometimes feel an orgasm in the vagina more strongly. In most cases, the clitoris is not stimulated by vaginal penetration, so orgasm is much less likely to occur through sex.

8. Its a myth that when a woman says no she actually means maybe. To proceed with sex without your partners consent is a bad idea, irrespective of your gender.

9. Many women believe they cant get pregnant during their periods. The truth is, a woman can conceive anytime she has intercourse.

While menstruation is the most unlikely time for pregnancy in women who have regular period cycles (every 28-32 days), women who have irregular periods that last only 20 to 26 days, may get pregnant during menstruation.

The sperm can live in the body for three to five days after intercourse. Also, a woman who has irregular or shorter cycles can ovulate earlier than normal.

10. A woman experiences her physical sexual peak between her 30s and 40s, and psychological sexual peak in her 50s, which explains the Toy Boy Syndrome (older woman-younger man relationship). Her drive is natures way of pushing her into last-minute childbearing urges before menopause sets in. Case in point Hollywood actor Demi Moore who is dating model-actor Ashton Kutcher, a man 16 years younger than her.

What is PSAS?
Doctors have identified a new sexual condition affecting women. Tentatively labelled Persistent Sexual Arousal Syndrome or PSAS, its primary symptom is relatively constant, unrelieved feelings of genital arousal in the absence of genuine sexual interest or desire.

Says Dr Goldmeier in The International Journal of STD and AIDS, PSAS occurs when a woman becomes involuntarily aroused for extended periods of time in the absence of sexual desire.

The study said it was unclear what the cause of PSAS was, although a link to antidepressants has not been ruled out. Clinical observations of the condition have found evidence of engorgement and oedema of the labia, vulva and clitoris.

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