Dear Diana,
My husband and I recently had our first sexual encounter. He claims I was not a virgin because when he entered me, there was a gap in my vagina, and because I did not bleed. He is a very narrow-minded person and is ruining my marriage with these accusations.

Sex with him is very painful but even though I tell him that, he does not stop. I believe he is showing his anger by hurting me in this way. He has started drinking and using abusive language with me. He also claims I am in an affair with my cousin brother who is far younger than me and treats me like his own sister. He keeps checking my call logs on my cell phone.

I am worried of planning a family with this man. He has physically abused me when drunk because I refused to have sex with him. The next morning, he calmly ate his breakfast as if last night never happened.

How do I prove to him that I was a virgin when I married him? Do you think such menu00a0-- who keep doubting and physically abusing their wivesu00a0-- ever change? Please advise.

Name withheld

Dear Friend,
A guy who can suspect you with your brother is not only narrow-minded, but also filthy minded. Unfortunately, such people never change. Today it's your brother, tomorrow it could be someone else. Marriage is a partnership where both individuals love, trust and respect each other.

I don't see any of these emotions coming from his side here. He has made up his mind about your virginity and whatever you do, you cannot change his mind, because he is not willing to reconsider. I see only one option for you and that is to leave him.

If you stay with him, this guy will only erode your self-esteem and that of your future child, day by day. Talk to your family about your plight. If they are not supportive, then get a job, become financially independent and move into a women's hostel. You may want to engage a lawyer and also decide if you want to take legal recourse for marital rape.

I like her, she likes someone else

Dear Diana,
I like this girl in my college for the past one year. We recently became friends on Facebook and I told her my feelings. She said she's dating someone else. How can I convince her I love her a lot?