How to

Hi Sandhya, I'm a 17 year-old boy from Mumbai. I have been in a casual relationship with a 16 year-old girl.

Hi Sandhya,
I'm a 17 year-old boy from Mumbai. I have been in a casual relationship with a 16 year-old girl. She recently went to London to study further and we called off our relationship. Now I can't seem to stop thinking about her and feel I'm in love. I'm aware that she has moved on and likes another guy and thinks of me as a friend. Should I tell her my true feelings and risk our friendship? Please help me!
Thanks,
A


Sandhya Mridul

Dear A,
I believe that the foundation of any relationship is honesty. Feelings must be expressed and communicated clearly and fearlessly. In this situation, you probably fear rejection, but you cannot not take that chance and suppress what you feel. Pick up the phone or the pen and tell her exactly how you feel. Do it positively with no angst and no expectations but keep the faith. Trust me, to most women, courage is an admirable and attractive quality. As for risking the friendship, I think that onus might just fall on you. Because if she says no, you will have to handle it well and accept it gracefully if you want to keep the friendship alive. So, the ball is in your court. Hit it with speed and precision and hope for an ace!

Hi Sandhya,
I don't think I have a problem but my friends think I do. They call me a shopaholic. Whenever I enter the mall which is quite often, I end up buying a lot of stuff, most of which I don't need. I'm getting a lot of grief from my parents too. I know that the balance in my account is becoming less every day and that really scares me, but I somehow can't stop myself from shopping. I don't know what to do. Please help.
Avni

Hi Sandhya,
Dear Avni, so long as you're shopping not on credit and from your hard earned money, go for it. Till your bank runs dry, in which case you will have to stop. But if you're shopping on your parents hard earned money, shame on you because that's not cool at all and you must stop now! And shopping on credit and not coming good on the payments -- well, that could only lead to a legal mess and maybe some arrests. So, if you're not into that scene, stop. Because life is really not a Sophie Kinsella book where Becky gets away with everything. Other than that, retail therapy is good, but there's also yoga, which is cheaper and more beneficial. Some gurus say compulsive shopping is an emotional void one is trying to fill. What do you think?

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