Burra Din with the babalog

Today is Christmas Day or Burra Din as we Anglos sometimes refer to it while speaking in our broken lsquoHindeersquo Enough reason for this columnist to slip into fantastical mode wondering how her Maxine nana grandmother for the uninitiated would have reacted if she watched Zoya Akhtarrsquos The Archies Here is her imagined letter to the director and her teamMy dear Zoya girlFirst of all heartiest congratulations to you and your team for showcasing my people in a good light after decades I thank the Lord that I could live to see this day before I kicked the bucketNever in my wildest dreams did I imagine that the same comic books which my granddaughter Fiona would pore over during her summer holiday breaks with us would bring the community back into public imagination It is a relief honestly to see us portrayed not as riffraffs like those characters in the Hindee films where we are either drunkards scheming vamps frivolous bar dancers or lapragundatype boys Those movies caused ldquoek dum dokardquo to the community Because of this popular builtup perception all of us were painted with the same brush I suspect St Anthony might have worked a miracle to cause this positive turnCredit to you for sourcing mostly accurate information when it came to characterising our micro community that has unfortunately scattered in all directions over time Yoursquove managed to paint a pretty pictureperfect panorama Dare I say a tad too pretty My dear husband JacobmdashGod bless his soul mdashwould agree with what I am about to say The youngsters look like pucca missy mems and the mamakopucho babalog from my youthful days I teared up when I spotted that Cooper girlrsquos outfits The memories came racing back mdashof begging the darzee baiyya to replicate patterns from foreign magazines that showcased the best of Hollywoodrsquos fashionsYour filmmdashand I hope I am rightmdashmay have reminded people that we were once a large community in India We are a peaceful and welleducated bunch we swear by our ball curry and OT I missed seeing our burra khana in the film we sing and dance we work hard just as much as we believe in the lsquoQue Sera Serarsquo way of life Most importantly we possess a strong sense of community Today our numbers have dwindled which is why I suspect that our existence and our contributions are no longer in the public domain Unlike what is portrayed in your film the 1960s was a challenging time for AIs in India with real issues beyond saving a green park and development We were grappling with our identity in a country that was transitioning really fast Many migrated to foreign lands to seek better opportunities or join their families who had moved there post 1947 We also began to feel dare I say sidelined after more people picked up the English language which is our lsquomother tonguersquo Thus we were no longer sought after especially in the fields of education railways and hospitality But I gather that this wasnrsquot meant to be a historic documentary you have interpreted our lives using what film people call ldquocreative libertiesrdquo If that wasnrsquot the intent forgive me for overstepping my boundaries as a senior AI from another eraHowever if you would still like to know about the real deal a trip to McCluskieganj would be perfect Longtime residents are bound to reminisce about the glory days of big Christmas balls and bigger culinary spreads that reflected the traditions of community bonding Or you could head to former railway towns like Kharagpore that were lined with quaint bungalows belonging to engine drivers ticket collectors and linesmen who would have regaled you seated in their verandahs with stories while being ldquoon linerdquo Got you there didnrsquot I lsquoOn linersquo is the term used for all railway folk who worked on a moving train These lastsurviving towns are filled with delightful storytellers You can thank me laterMy favourite part was reliving that trippy number Wooly Bully by Sam The Sham and The Pharaohs It took me back to those doomdarm parties when we would sneak out from the windows after our parents fell asleep The dance floor would be filled with chappies looking like Anglo Presleys Have you heard about them Elvis Presleystyle imitators among AIs were given this tagmdashthey had slickedback hair thick sideburns wore thin leather belts and moved with a swagger like the superstar Hank was my favourite he jived like a dreamhellipBobberyBobrsquoNuff saidhellip I must head back to check on my Devil chilly fry Once again a burra Thank You and good wishes for a bright 2024 Oh yes and in your next film please include the fox trot I will be happy to play tutorGod bless Maxinemiddayrsquos Features Editor Fiona Fernandez relishes the cityrsquos sights sounds smells and stoneswherever the ink and the inclination takes her She tweets bombayanaSend your feedback to mailbagmiddaycom