Cannes out-takes

MEANIES meanies meanies When you finally get your Big Moment on the red carpet of the Cannes Film Festival as a Jury member on Opening Night and pause to take a selfie burly bouncers in black pounce on you and force you to put your mobile phone away selfies are banned on the red carpet Eeks Itrsquos like not getting a photo of your shaadi Whaaat The irony is yoursquore amidst a phalanx of photographers taking photographs of you hounding you ldquoSari sari look here pleaserdquo but I donrsquot know any of them or how to contact them later Isnrsquot half the mazaa sharing the photo with family and friends and years later with your grandchildren even if thatrsquos highly theoretical in my caseSo along with Ava Cahen Artistic Director Semaine de la Critique Criticsrsquo Week there we were on the red carpet the Criticsrsquo Week Jury members Audrey Diwan Jury President FrenchLebanese directorscreenwriter her film The Happening won the Golden Lion at Venice in 2021 brilliant German actor Franz Rogowski Terrence Malickrsquos A Hidden Life Christian Petzoldrsquos Undine Kim Yutani Sundance Film Festivalrsquos Director of Programming Rui Poccedilas masterly Portuguese director of photography Tabu by Miguel Gomes Zama by Lucretia Martel and moi Clearly the selfie ban is meant to control the quality of ultra glam high fashion celebrity images on the tapis rouge and the montee des marchesmdashred carpet and climbing of the stepsmdashbeamed out from Cannes to the world And celebrities ODing on selfies can delay screenings But hum bhi kisise kam nahin and we sneaked a quick smudgy photo at the top of the stairs Indians are nothing if not jugaad ka ustads Still it struck me as curmudgeonly to prevent you from snapping your one Big Momentmdashwhich the Berlin Film Festival for instance does not deny its guests despite the same constraints But the worst is I have personally seen productsponsored Indian celebrities who pout on the red carpet actually go up the steps to the screening at the Palais des Festivalsmdashthen do a kalti and escape from the side doorsmdashthey do not even watch the film for which they have got tickets and for which film lovers are ready to kill outside AarghMy heart stopped when I was guided to my seat in the Palais des Festivals reserved for our jurymdashand found my name marked on it Oh gosh that felt like Cannes royalty After the opening film Jeanne du Barry by Maiumlwenn we were invited to the opening night dinner and seated close to French actress Catherine Deneuve Even in her late 70s she radiated beauty and a regal aura that effortlessly dissuaded people from generally asking for selfies or autographsAt Cannes I got an unexpected text from Anila Gill an old and dear friend halfSikh halfFrench who used to be my roomie when we did the Film Appreciation course at the Film and Television Institute of India FTII in a previous lifetimemdashin 1992 She said her sister Sandrine Gill from Paris was visiting Cannes so I invited her to an informal addabaji with journos Aseem Chhabra and Shubhra Gupta where Kanu Behl director of Agra in Directorsrsquo Fortnight and others joined us I introduced Sandrine Gillmdashand guess what It turned out that Sandrine Gill and Kanu Behl were from the same school Yadavindra Public School in Patiala In minutes Sandrine was fishing out their old school photos on her phone and asking Kanu ldquoWas this your Principal too Do you recognize this teacherrdquo All at a cafeacute in Cannes ha ha it was delightfulWhat I love about Cannesmdashor the Western world you can go to a posh party where everyone cool is having hard drinks look the bartender in the eye and unapologetically ask for water Aah I felt like the Phantom asking for a glass of milk at the bar I love it Long live lrsquoeauMeenakshi Shedde is India and South Asia Delegate to the Berlin International Film Festival National Awardwinning critic curator to festivals worldwide and journalistReach her at meenakshisheddemiddaycom