'My cousin is acting strange with me...'

My cousin has been staying with us since the past four months. I am 18 and he is 26

Dear Diana,
My cousin has been staying with us since the past four months. I am 18 and he is 26. He is my father's elder brother's son. He recently took up a job in Mumbai and till he finds a rented place he will be staying with us. His family is based in Nagpur. Initially, he was okay, but now he is proving to be a nuisance. I am the only child and all these years, it was only me and my parents. I feel there is an intrusion on my privacy. I have also started feeling uncomfortable having him around at home. I do not like the way he looks at me. The other day, I accompanied him to a mall in Malad. We bumped into his office colleague who thought that I was his girlfriend. He kept laughing and did not even tell the guy that I was his cousin. After this incident, he has been acting funny with me. He hums some silly romantic numbers when I am around, but I choose to ignore him. Worse is when we have our evening meals together. I have to put on a facade in front of my father. I do not want him in the house. How do I tell my father without sounding offensive? My mother says she can't tell him as his parents will get upset.
— Ayesha

 

Dear Ayesha,
He knows that you feel he is nuisance value, so he is purposely irritating you. He also knows that your dad will not say anything that offends him as he is his elder brother's son. Your mom feels if she chides him, it will blow out of proportion and become a family issue. But at the same time you need to have a chat with your dad. Explain to him your predicament and the mall incident. As it is a family member, things will have to be done with tact so that your uncle does not get offended. He might be just teasing you, but if you do not like it, he needs to stop. This needs to be told to him. It is better that your dad speak to him. Your father can also help him find a place so that he can move out faster. If it takes him a while to find a suitable place of his own, you will have to be patient till then.

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