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Quirky condoms

Updated on: 04 December,2009 09:36 AM IST  | 
Hemal Ashar | hemal@mid-day.com

World Aids Day (December 1) just went past us, in a blaze of hype and publicity. A doctor once said that in this age where gaining attention is important, even diseases have to be 'marketed' these days.

Quirky condoms

World Aids Day (December 1) just went past us, in a blaze of hype and publicity. A doctor once said that in this age where gaining attention is important, even diseases have to be 'marketed' these days. Aids has done that better than most other ailments. So, with Aids and condoms taking up so much news space recently, here's a quirky look and some insane suggestions for condom manufacturers.u00a0u00a0

This columnist wonders why condom manufacturers do not make condoms like:u00a0

The Board of Control for Cricket in India (BCCI) condom: I have certain wicket, wicked ways to bowl a maiden over.

The cabbies condom: In a combination pack of black and yellow.

The MNS condom: Can only be bought by the Marathi manoos.

The Mahendra Singh Dhoni condom: Hope to score tonight.

The Page 3 condom: I am a designer condom, dahling. Look for the label on the pack.
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The gay condom: I cost much less than Rs 377. (Referring to section 377 of the Indian Penal Code that criminalised homosexuality.)u00a0u00a0

The Censor Board condom: No dirty talk, please or you will get an 'A' certificate from the board.

The Virar to Churchgate fast condom: I am always your first class choice.

The movie-goers condom: I am also available in a multiplex pack.

The climate change condom: So what is wrong with feelin' hot, hot, hot?

The Bombay Stock Exchange (BSE) condom: Always in the mood for (Sen)sex

The Nike sports condom: Just Do It

The Bollywood condom: I star in sex scenes only because the script demands it.

The weight watchers condom: I am available in a new, slim pack.

The chess enthusiast's condom: Available in two colours black or white.


The Mumbai bus commuter condoms: I am the BEST.

The estate agents condom: Unlike Mumbai's real estate, I cost the same in both north and south Mumbai.

The Mumbai Heritage Society condom: Like our heritage buildings, you need protection too.

The Ambani condom: You can Rely(ance) on us.

The Raymonds condom: We make you the complete man.

The gym-obsessed condom: Special discount for a six-pack.

The Mumbai University condom: For bachelors and masters too.

The Mumbai lingo condom: In dhasu, fundoo and jhakaas packs.



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