Famous for being herself

I only ever made one friend from Twitter Her name was Surekha Her Twitter handle was also surekha Thatrsquos a storyTwo days ago Surekha died of Covid19 Hundreds of us expressed our grief and loss online A young colleague messaged me ldquoWhere can I read more about Surekha I donrsquot know who she was but from all the mentions Irsquom seeing she seems to be someone who touched many hearts in a profound wayrdquo A friend DMrsquod ldquoI always meant to ask you what she didrdquoWhat did Surekha do Well be SurekhaSurekha loved trees nosepins cooking Peter Pan collars poetry her daughter fried fish and beef roast Miyazaki music masti and people She shared this love extravagantly and made people a part of its enjoyment She shared peoplersquos art and writing fulsomely She shared hugs online which seemed weirdly meaningfulmdashbecause they were meant She accompanied Priya Ramani to every hearing in her MeToo casemdashand helped us be part of it with her tweets She pretended to be the mother of a boy she met during the antiCAA protests to prevent him being arrested dressed in a funny winter cap and did it again She tweeted from the bus of protestors detained at Lal Qila and from Shaheen Bagh and helped us partake of the intimacies love and vulnerability that make political spaces sustaining and beautiful Perhaps she found it for herself but she also drew others in with her One day she called me and said ldquoCan you send me a book from your personal collection for the Jamia Pavement Library I want something of yours to be thererdquo I sent my favourite book and felt suffused with the love of being part of a larger whole Every time I was likely to meet a friend of hers she would demand we send a selfie We did and felt warmed by lovemdashyou can see it in our smiles No one love was less than another political or personalAs my friendship with Surekha grew we argued disagreed judged and encouraged each othermdashldquowant one kick Shy kai Share your workrdquo she scolded me I knew she battled her own set of challenges her own deep woundedness I also saw her heal herself bit by bit by constantly expanding her circle of love and renewing her political understandings asking for generosity as much as giving itOnce I joked ldquoat least you love me if no one else doesrdquo She said ldquoMy love is equal to hundred times othersrsquo love okrdquoWhat is love Perhaps it is to see the essence of others and give them what they needmdashto someone a hug to someone advice to another shared fun But perhaps it is mostly the painful courage to be yourself to live as if you are loved flaws missteps bad jokes and all even if you struggle with that belief as who does not And to embody with that the belief in peoplersquos capacity to love you to receive that love even when it comes in disguise or in uncertain modes To craft a world with those precarious things love and connection and make people long to be that way To multiply the love a hundred timesLove was indeed her enterprise And so to answer my colleague Surekha was famous for being SurekhaParomita Vohra is an awardwinning Mumbaibased filmmaker writer and curator working with fiction and nonfiction Reach her at paromitavohramiddaycom