Architect Viraj Thakur and his girlfriend, writer Anokhi Saxena, have made a “list of firsts”. It includes baking a cake together, enjoying the debut Netflix bingeing session, attending design retreats and giving each other a head massage. Why this was necessary was because before this relationship, 25-year-old Thakur had been in six romantic engagements, all of them lasting one year. He started dating at 17, and never stopped. Their “list of firsts” is an exercise to acknowledge the many things the couple is doing together that he didn’t with his previous loves. “Initially, I was facing a problem. I’d wonder and enquire whether he had shared these experiences with the women before me. But then I realised I had to let it rest. On the other hand, I’ve had only one serious relationship and that bothers Viraj. So,we both had to decide to let go,” says Saxena, 26. But, she also says that she feels, thanks to his previous relationships, Thakur is mature for his age.

He agrees with that point of view, when he says that multiple relationships mentally prepare you for loving yourself, and someone else. “I had started feeling that I wasn’t capable of loving someone for long. ‘I wondered, will I ever get married? I am in a more relaxed space now.” That means that neither is he seeing other women, nor does he feel compelled to hide from Anokhi. “It’s only been six months, but like our list of firsts, I can firmly say, I have never had six months with anyone like I’ve had with her. I don’t find myself lying, which I used to all the time. I don’t wish to experience the stress of getting caught. I rather she doesn’t talk to me for a bit [after hearing the truth] than lie to her.”