When is the right time to get intimate?

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I have been in a relationship for six months, but I don't want to be pushed into having sex with my boyfriend. We love each other a lot and I have no problem with physical intimacy, but I want it to happen normally at its own pace, not because it is expected by both of us. I don't know how to tell him this without making him feel as if I don't love him or trust him. I know he will never force me, but I also want this to be special, and doing it just for the sake of it is not appealing. How will I know when the right time is, and what should I tell him?
Relationships evolve when two people learn to trust each other enough to talk about what their expectations are. In fact, people who have clear ideas about what they want from their partners are those who build strong, long-lasting bonds because there are open lines of communication and fewer chances of misinterpretation or misunderstandings. There is nothing wrong with what you say, and you have every right to decide when you want to be intimate with your boyfriend. As for when the right time is, there is no manual on how much time needs to pass before you feel as if you are ready. Think about it in terms of when you feel close enough to want to take your relationship to that level of intimacy. If you don't feel comfortable with it, take as much time as you need. This is also what you should tell him, without fear of pushing him away, because honesty will only bring you closer to each other.

My boyfriend doesn't like my choices when it comes to food, and this affects our relationship in some ways. He wants me to give up some of my habits, but I don't know if he is being fair.
He's not. It's your body, and you alone get to decide what you can and will not eat.

The inbox is now open to take your most carnal and amorous queries. Send your questions on email to lovedoc@mid-day.com