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Destined to crash and burn

Updated on: 28 January,2011 09:34 AM IST  | 
Anjana Vaswani |

The food at Flames Cafe, a new eatery on Warden Road is okay when you get it, but with appalling service and unforgiving chaos, an evening here might just end up in smoke

Destined to crash and burn

The food at Flames Cafe, a new eatery on Warden Road is okay when you get it, but with appalling service and unforgiving chaos, an evening here might just end up in smoke









Since at least two people we spoke to were unable to offer coherent directions to the place, we were prepared for the worst by the time when we reached the restaurant, which was way inside the building that houses Subway on the main road.

Still, the servers' incredible ineptness managed to surprise us. At lunchtime, when we entered Flames, the deserted space with its tacky red walls and red lighting was uninviting. To make things worse, one of the waiters suddenly decided to turn up the music to discotheque decibel level, and when we, the only customers inside, requested to bring it down to a level that aided conversation, another chap took that as a cue to boost the volume on the cricket match.

While gold masquerade masks mounted on the walls, at least, had some Italian connection -- Mardi Gras being a huge deal in the European country -- the presence of sheeshas were mysterious. If we lived in the Arab world, we may have expected to spot, or at least have understood, the presence of these pipes at an Italian restaurant, but at Flames, these stood out like a nun at Chippendales.

The menus were a mess, a fact that was particularly surprising since we were informed that the place -- to call it a cafe would just be plain wrong -- had only opened its doors on January 7. We did, however, enjoy spotting items like Choclate Mouse and Kit Kate Shake, on the list, which was otherwise purely ornamental -- most of the dishes, including these unique variations, weren't available.

Only specific waiters were equipped to take orders, and even they seemed confused about the menu. Of the dishes we managed to sample, the 7-inch-Margarita Pizza (Rs 125) was good and the surprisingly-spicy Cheese Corn Balls (Rs 120) were pleasant.

A dish, ambitiously dubbed, Pasta in Sunlight of Sicily (Rs 275), was disappointingly dull and while our order of Onion Rings never made it to our table, the Garlic Bread (Rs 80) that arrived at the very end of our meal, was strangely sweet. Finally, by a bizarre coincidence, our tab was totalled under the heading, Zero Foods Inc, -- close to the score we'd give the place.

At Flames Cafe, No 5, Chinoy Mansion, ground floor, opposite St Stephen's Church, Warden Road.
Call 67439343u00a0
Flames Cafe didn't know we were there.u00a0The Guideu00a0reviews anonymously and pays for meals.

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